Arnel Bélizaire Open Letter: "Streets safer with me in Parliament"
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Sunday, December 18, 2011 5:00 PM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti - In an open letter to the people of Haiti, Deputy Arnel Bélizaire requested an apology from President Michel Martelly and expressed content in the fact that the streets are much safer with him in parliament.
Oprah Surprises Haitians with Car Giveaway
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Wednesday, December 14, 2011 6:53 AM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – On a recent trip to Haiti, television talk-show queen Oprah Winfrey surprised the entire population of the Caribbean nation by giving each resident a free car.
Haiti: Martelly Subscribes to Groupon for Daily Deals On Military Equipment
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Sunday, December 11, 2011 6:03 PM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – As Haiti prepares to remobilize its disbanded army, sources confirmed that President Michel Martelly has joined the popular coupon website Groupon for daily deals on military gear.
Area Man Regrets Telling Everyone about Upcoming Trip to Haiti
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Sunday, December 04, 2011 5:07 PM
ASBURY PARK, NJ – Ever since local resident Price Dumerzier revealed his upcoming trip to Haiti, the 29-year-old has been inundated with requests from relatives, friends and minor acquaintances to reserve space in his suitcase for them.
Haitian Officials Say Missing $26 Million is Being Used To Produce 'I Love You Anne 2'
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Sunday, November 27, 2011 10:41 PM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – Amid mounting pressure over the whereabouts of the $26 million missing from Haiti’s National Fund for Education (FNE), the Martelly administration was forced to publicly acknowledge that the money is being used to finance We Love You Anne, the highly anticipated sequel to Tonton Bicha’s 2003 smash hit comedy I Love You Anne.
Former Haitian Soldiers Irritated They Got Back in Shape for Nothing
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Wednesday, November 23, 2011 8:47 AM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – Immediately after President Michel Martelly announced his plan to forego reinstating the Haitian Army, a number of ex-military members reacted angrily to the news, saying they have spent weeks getting back into shape physically for apparently nothing.
Area Man Stunned after Haitian Event Starts on Time [VIDEO]
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Friday, November 18, 2011 10:12 AM
QUEENS, NY – Local Haitian resident Raphael Dufort expressed his disbelief to friends after witnessing a Haitian event starting right on time.
Haiti Reconciliation: Aristide Confirms Cédras as Friend on Facebook
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Friday, November 11, 2011 12:52 PM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – In a further sign of progress towards national unity, former President Jean-Bertrand Aristide has accepted ex-military ruler Raoul Cédras’s request to add him as a friend on Facebook.
‘You Can’t Go Out And Play Until You’ve Fixed The Economy,’ Says Garry Conille’s Mom
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Wednesday, November 02, 2011 11:44 AM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – Mother of newly ratified prime minister, Dr. Garry Conille, refuses to let her son go play outside until he turns the nation’s crippled economy around, friends reported.
Disguised Raoul Cédras Caught Trying To Win Old Job Back
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Wednesday, October 26, 2011 10:37 AM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – Wearing a fake black mustache, former army General Raoul Cédras was caught on Monday as he attempted to convince the Martelly administration to put him in charge of the new army, Haitian officials said.
Martelly Uses App To Remind He is President, Not Sweet Micky
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Monday, October 24, 2011 10:03 AM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – National Palace advisers acknowledged on Tuesday that Michel Martelly uses a smartphone application to remind him he is the nation’s president and no longer his lewd alter ego, Sweet Micky.
Preval Asked To Return National Palace Spare Keys
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Sunday, October 16, 2011 7:11 PM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti - Though out of office for months, ex-President Preval has been seen regularly inside the crumpled National Palace in recent weeks prompting officials to ask the former head of state to turn over his spare keys.
Haiti Opposition Hopes To Reject Five Prime Minister Nominations By Year-End
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Thursday, September 15, 2011 9:03 AM
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – Continuing a trend that began last June, Haiti’s opposition-dominated parliament revealed today that they hope to reject a total of five of president Michel Martelly’s nominees for prime minister by the end of the year.
Martelly Assures Haitians, Presidency Won't Interfere with Upcoming Concerts
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- Category: Satire
- Created on Wednesday, April 06, 2011 10:00 AM
Political Satire
PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti - In a radio interview, President-Elect Michel Martelly announced that the presidency will not prevent him from performing at several upcoming shows.
